For the longest time, I was unable to type here while sitting at my office desk. It appears I can now do that again. HALLELUJAH!
It has been quite some time since I posted here and, although, I think about posting here all the time, I don't seem to follow through. Inspiration seems to really hit me at the strangest, less convenient of times, and let's face it I'm hesitant to put some of my feelings/experiences/life out there. It's been over a year since I've posted and WOW has my life changed.
I AM A MOM! AND I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT!
That seems to be the most exciting and maybe surprising change in my life. I am also in the midst of some interesting and very exciting career changes. Additionally, I have been through some of the roughest, most stressful, heart-breaking, moments in my life. It's been quite a year (as I like to put it)-- An emotional roller coaster for sure. I am not sure if I want to get into more detail about some of the experiences I have encountered this past year, you know because NOONE reads this (haha), but I would like to put it out there that life is not perfect and although I have been blessed in so many ways, there are struggles I am dealing with just like everyone else. I just tend to like to keep some of those in my handwritten private journal. - we will see, I am trying to work on opening up, and letting people in. I know that I struggle with trusting people with my emotions, feelings, personal details. I like to keep some things private, because people are sometimes way too judgmental, and don't JUST listen enough or they have their own problems, why bog them down with mine. And sometimes some of the things that you complain about or want to say about someone are in the heat of the moment, and are almost meaningless. Emotions can make you say and do things that you really don't genuinely mean. Sometimes, people need an ear to listen to their rants and raves, and that's all -- or to hear that someone can relate. But too often, I find that everyone has their opinions and advice and even worse sometimes people barely listen and turn it around to be about them -- which in turn makes me even more upset. I like to think that I am that ear to some people and when people can't lend me that ear in return, it hurts.
Anyhow, I've been through a lot and that's the point. Time flies, but a lot can happen and change in a year. A perfect example of that are babies - look at how much they develop, change, and learn within that timeframe - it is amazing! My daughter blows my mind just about everyday. I'm hoping that I can find time to come here more often and unload a bit. I need to write, I like to write, and sometimes I really wish my thoughts were being translated to a page somewhere for someone to read -- to be heard.
