Tuesday, October 25, 2016

33

Today I am 33! October 25 2016 

I genuinely don't think it sounds that bad... yes I am getting up there, but hey, I still feel young, I still know how to have fun, and enjoy being active - hey I wish I was MORE active actually, Maybe that could be one of my birthday wishes this year.  33 bring me more activity! Everyone that knows me, knows that I LOVE activities! I suck at relaxing, my husband will vouch for me, he really tries to make me sit down with him, and just about every time, I get antsy, and fidgety, and look for excuses to get up and do something.  My mind is always on GO.  Maybe that is something else I should wish for at 33 - 33 teach me to relax!

I am not sure how I feel about birthdays, they can be fun, and enjoyable, and full of love -- but being the center of attention is just NOT MY THING.  I love being around friends and family, there's nothing like that feeling you get after a nice gathering, but the anxiety I have before the actual series of events , gets me every darn time!  Do you know that my best friend, my husband, and family threw  me a really nice 25th surprise birthday (25 on the 25th) party once, and I walked in, walked away and cried because it wasn't what I wanted.... LOL.  Obviously, I had to compose myself, and get it together, and it ended up being one of my most memorable and favorite birthdays of all time.... I mean I also got to see Coldplay VIP - like 3 rows from the stage, next to a little catwalk that came out to the audience - and it was 2008, and I was a huge Coldplay fan! Chris Martin was my hearthrob!  Anyhow...

I am sitting at work right now, awaiting someone coming over to me to coax me into a conference room to sing friggen happy birthday to me, and it's taking every ounce of energy I have to not just RUN for it! LOL... my anxiety is high, and like they couldn't be any more obvious, and I am observant enough  to catch on to these things...

Sunday, October 23, 2016

Sunday Snippet Vol. 17

TRENDY

I don't do things because they are trendy, nor do I avoid things that are trendy.  I like what I like, it is what it is, trendy or not.  I can appreciate things that are not quite "for me", but that doesn't mean I am going to do things just to "keep up with the joneses".  It's important to stay true to you, and not let popularity influence who you are. 

I, sometimes, like things that are "trendy" too, such as coffee, and craft beer, IPAs, food.... and so on... but I am not going to force my tastes upon you, or judge you for not knowing about coffee, or beer, or cooking.  We all should like what we like, and take interest in what we want to, right?  That's what keeps the world going.

Thursday, October 13, 2016

Let it go!

Sometimes we all feel a little lost....right?
It's not easy to find your place in this world.  If I am being completely honest, a lot of the time I feel like I am not doing what I am supposed to be.  I'm doing what's comfortable, and it makes me uncomfortable.  Is this what I am supposed to be doing? 

I think I want more.

Is that a bad thing?   I have so many things to be grateful for, but I can't shake the feeling that I am missing something... I am not living up to my potential. 

I feel like I get held back easily, because I am always worried about others, and I get attached to people and things.  I am not good at letting go.. I think that's a big thing for me, letting go... I wouldn't say that I am bad with change, I think change excites me, but letting go, that's another story.

Friday, October 7, 2016

Spontaneity

Ok - I think it is time for me to finally play a little catch-up.  I was going to start by sharing things with you sort of chronologically but that was kind of un-inspiring to me. So, I chose to start with a spontaneous little adventure Zoey and I had last month......

  It was a Friday,  and I just remember feeling the urge to get out, and do something different....but I was also in "slow mode" that day -like I was getting things done....but it was taking me some time.  I think I had some sort of inner battle going on over whether to be spontaneous or not, but eventually around 3:00pm, I decided to hop in the car and head up north to this Sunflower Maze with Zoey. Well, it didn't take long for me to realize that I was leaving at rush hour on a Friday, and traffic was definitely going to be a problem. I wanted to kick myself a little. I thought about turning around, and I thought about the universe telling me not to do this, but for some reason I was determined to go to this Sunflower  Maze. (It also didn't help that it was the last weekend of the season that this maze was going to be open.)  I utilized the good old Waze app, which took me on and off so many highways, county roads, main roads, back roads, and so on... But it got us there- I just felt like I drove around, and through a lot of traffic along the way.  Zoey was a trooper though, I told her she did good.  We were about 15 minutes away from our destination when she first said to me, "momma, no more drive. "Momma, get down".... I explained to her we were close, and told her she did so good.   I was just really hoping this Sunflower Maze didn't suck LOL.......And it didn't.....thank goodness!

We arrived around the same time as the ONLY other guests at the place.  It was a little family - mother, father, One year old daughter, and what I guessed to be the baby's grandmother.  The place was really cute, they had farm animals out front, along with cute "hay bale art" - I'll call it, and tractors, and pretty flowers, etc. - you will see, I have pictures of it all.. so much for Zoey to see, and touch, and be excited about, and she was.  She ran around, and looked, and touched, and even smelled everything... We had to walk a little ways, to get to the actual Sunflower Maze, but she was up for it, and was very good about following me, and listening to me.  We ended up meeting up with the other family visiting, they offered to take a picture of Zoey and me together - which I was SO darn GRATEFUL for.  It made my day, I even told them that.  Zoey, and the little girl made friends, and we hung out with them for a while, walked around, they hugged each other.  It was all so very sweet.  I documented most of it, and I don't think there is really one picture I took that I don't like.... Sorry guys!!





















She really pressed that little cheek against mine.































 
 
As you can see the natural light was quite beautiful.  The timing was actually kind of perfect in that sense.  #brightsideofthings

The old man who ran the place told us on the way back we could pick one flower each.  So, Zoey and I did just that.  Zoey picked a beautiful, pretty large one, and "carried it" the entire walk back to the car.  She said "I love it"and hugged it.  ahh... It was so precious.  She commented on how pretty everything was, and smelled all the flowers. 
























































It was a perfectly imperfect day.  I was so happy we stuck it out in the end.  We may have dealt with traffic, ate our dinner on the go, and gotten home way past bed-time, but adventures like that feed my soul and bring me pure joy. 

Remember to be Spontaneous once in a while.