Inspired

Here I am posting again.....I always say I am going to start blogging again, "It's good for me", but then I never do... Which is sometimes "The Story of My Life" but yesterday an old friend of mine from highschool sent me a facebook message about my blog, which I THOUGHT no one read, but YOU know what thought did??? right?? (thought she only farted, but shit her pants) hahaha.... ok so here I am at work on my lunch break blogging away......

Life has been ULTRA busy lately, between work and events and just LIFE. My fiance and I are looking to buy a house, which is soo exciting on the one hand, but then stressful and tedious on the other. It is such a process and I really wish someone could just DO IT FOR ME.. It's like a big game, and looking at houses is soo draining. I just wish someone could hand us a house, or money for a house, SOMETHING. Some people have it soo easy and I really wish sometimes that i could just be handed some things in life. That is not the case and I guess in the end I learn a lot more this way, but sometimes I think I deserve a break over the people who actually catch breaks. I also work with people with MEGA$ and it's frustrating to see how much money they can throw around like its nothing, enough to buy my house or half of it - INVEST IN ME!!! :)

Then we finally find a house we LOVE, a little over our price range, but in this market, bidding low and selling lower than your asking price is pretty COMMON, yet the person's house we bid on was unwilling to lower their price. We bid much lower than their asking price and they counteroffered only $5,000 under their asking price. The house was newer to the market, so I guess she is waiting and hoping someone will come in closer to her asking price. It just SUCKS for US. I dreamt of that house last night and who knows maybe in the end she will come back to us. It is a possibility. We asked her to keep us in mind, but we are young, good people and I know something will work out for us. I try to keep the mindset of "What will be, Will be". It keeps me sane and less stressed. People around me stress more than I do and then it makes me stress and its just UGLY. Maybe sometimes I am just too lax though. I just sometimes don't see the point in stressing out. Karma is on our side, things will work out.

So I guess I am growing up, I am engaged, I am looking at houses, I will be getting married and I just can't believe it. It is sooo weird, I still feel soo young (MOST of the time). Am I ready to be a grown-up? I am definately ready for a space of my own and more time with Matt (my fiance). MOST of our relationship we have had little time for each other. We met when I was 19, I was going to community college, so I think that was the MOST time we had for each other. But we met in March and spent a lot of time together, but then in July I went away to Italy for a month. I returned in August, then went away to college in January and then all we really had was weekends for about a year. Then I finally brought my car up to school towards the end of my senior year and the trips to NJ during the week became more frequent ( a few more hours of each others company during the week). After graduation we had an amazing summer and then we both started working in September. I have a strict father so spending my life at Matt's house was never an option, so once again we only have weekends and its really only Friday nights, Saturday nights, and Sundays. Matt works on Saturdays during the day. Once in a while we hang out during the week, or see each other at the gym, but I've never been THAT girlfriend to spend every minute with my boyfriend. Not that I would want to be that person, because I do have my own life and enjoy having my own life, but having more time together would be a HUGE +.

Ok well I am cutting this off here, I need to get back to work.....